Hi, it’s Patrik Hutzel from INTENSIVECAREHOTLINE.COM where we instantly improve the lives for Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care, so that you can make informed decisions, have PEACE OF MIND, real power, real control and so that you can influence decision making fast, even if you’re not a doctor or a nurse in Intensive Care!
This is another episode of “YOUR QUESTIONS ANSWERED” and in last week’s episode I answered another question from our readers and the question was
You can check out last week’s question by clicking on the link here.
In this week’s episode of “YOUR QUESTIONS ANSWERED” I want to answer questions from one of my clients Tess, as part of my 1:1 consulting and advocacy service! Tess’s daughter is critically ill and ventilated. Tess is asking how to have power and control whilst her daughter is in the ICU.
How to Have Power and Control Whilst My Ventilated Daughter is Critically Ill in the ICU?
“You can also check out previous 1:1 consulting and advocacy sessions with me and Tess here.”
Patrik: Hi Tess! How are you? Patrik here of Intensive Care Hotline.
Tess: Hi, Patrik. I just want to ask, is there a chance that my daughter will leave the intensive care unit?
Patrik: I think it’s very realistic that she can leave intensive care alive, and then you will need to focus on rehabilitation. I’ll tell you what, as much as we all want to look in the future, I think it’s very wise to look at the situation like that day-by-day.
Patrik: We all want to look into the future, but you’ve got to take it day by day.
Tess: Yeah. I’m not being unrealistic, Patrik. I appreciate what you’re saying. At the same time, as you rightly say, 90% of them should actually be able to survive the ICU process.
Patrik: Yeah, yeah.
Tess: She is actually extremely… She’s been a miracle anyway to be here as we speak.
Tess: It’s a very iffy and tenuous situation which we have to navigate with great diplomacy, and have our negotiation skills heightened. I understand all of that, and I believe that with your kind assistance, and the fact that they are prepared to do a tracheostomy, and the fact that I am prepared to give my consent, and the fact that we’re not going to be pushing, pushing them to irritate them prior to their actually going ahead and doing it…She’s gone through so much so far, and they obviously want to just free up a bed, you know?
Patrik: Yeah. Look, I can tell you that there are many, many clients that I’m dealing with, where in a similar situation we need to professionally advocate for a tracheostomy, right?
Patrik: And that’s not the case in this situation, and I think timing is good. It’s 22 days. It’s time for a tracheostomy.
Patrik: You don’t need to advocate for it, which is a good sign.
Tess: Okay. It’s a good sign that they want to do the tracheostomy?
Patrik: Very good sign.
Tess: I’m going to pass you to Romeo, Patrik.
Patrik: Yeah, yeah. Sure.
Tess: Okay, thank you.
Patrik: Thank you.
Romeo: Yes. Thank you, Patrik.
Patrik: It’s a pleasure.
Romeo: Okay. Because I’ve got not much backup, living in this country, sort of thing. I mean, I’ve got some information but, yeah. Emma’s daughter has a very fast brain. You know very, very fast about looking. She’s been working. We love her and care for her.
Romeo: So it’s just like us being a family. Also, my friend’s dad, I used to go round and have lunch with her at the end of the day, things like that.
Romeo: She had a little indigenous fellow with her and I didn’t compete with her. And in my time off, I was a companion with her daughter. It was a 24-hour shift though, and she was a friend who was working in the hospital. Yeah, trying to encourage people that we’re coming to collect blood of their loved ones and that. Also, I would say that trees can’t just bear fruits. People thought that’s a miracle in there itself. As much as their loved ones were going to reach out and say, “Look, Dad, I love you. I’m sorry to say.” You know, sort of thing? It can’t. You’ve got to mention it for yourself. To-
Romeo: … someone you love. And then I walk in, I thought, “They don’t know where they’re going,” when that was going on. And as I’ve been present there and all that sort of stuff… You know my friend, she had her own practice. But my friend’s disappeared. Where is her family? I can’t get her. I can’t find her.
Romeo: She would always answer me, send me pictures where she’s at and what she’s doing and things. Never believe her to be like that.
Romeo: You know? So my friend was good. But yeah, I’m a calm person. I care for other people.
Patrik: I can hear that.
Romeo: I try to tell these doctors actually in a nice way that they’re being sarcastic to me. I mean, we’ve got one chance. One chance to get it right, do you know what I mean sort of thing? There’s no point in loving and caring for anybody if they were just going to die.
- “PEACE OF MIND, CONTROL, POWER AND INFLUENCE EVEN IN THE MOST CHALLENGING OF CIRCUMSTANCES THAT YOU, YOUR FAMILY AND YOUR CRITICALLY ILL LOVED ONE COULD POSSIBLY FACE IN INTENSIVE CARE!”
- THE 7 ANSWERS TO THE 7 MOST FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS IF YOUR LOVED ONE REQUIRES ONGOING MECHANICAL VENTILATION WITH TRACHEOSTOMY IN INTENSIVE CARE!
Patrik: Of course.
Romeo: Know what I mean? You’ve got to have strength. You’ve got to want to be. It’s their journey. Do you know what I mean? And even when I say, “Well, what do you think about that then?” Sticking the things up their noses in an unsanitized nose. Do you know what I mean? They injected people and they’re not even checking to see if they hit a vein.
Romeo: You know? And then I see through the vial and I can see the fact of what they’re doing and their plans and that. However nefarious it is, at the end of life, they also didn’t do the wrong thing, I can assure you that. Because I paralyzed myself before with PAVULON by mistake. All the liquids come out of me, all the excess… I could still hear and I could still think.
Romeo: And then there was no tubing. There was no tubing there to run off. The pharmacist had to run off to find that. She gave me adrenaline and put the drip in eventually. I switched that off because that was a bit closely. You know what I mean? I couldn’t move, and then I could. But then I couldn’t breathe because I had no oxygen. But something pressed on me. Something made me breathe, made me take a whole gulp of air, and then exhale as well. A big gulp of air.
Romeo: When I went to speak, to say, “Please don’t turn off the music,” just for a minute. When I did that again. I paralyzed myself. And reading the pamphlet afterwards that I was shown, that I’d come back as a cabbage with no oxygen. So there was a person and she was open… In her own words, she was on open-heart surgery, left for dead, no oxygen or anything. And she comes back and she’s writing forwards, backwards, upside down and all sorts, supposedly. Do you know? So there are miracles that happen. She suffered from –
Patrik: Oh look-
Romeo: … hypoxia.
Patrik: There are definitely miracles that happen. But for now, I would argue the most important thing is to get her through this critical phase.
Romeo: That’s right.
Patrik: And then you can look at what’s next.
Romeo: Yeah, because even when I mention things like so I do know a little bit. I read a hypnosis book and I was able to hypnotize people. I helped a person, one member, through an accident that happened. And then memories suppressed. Told her she was happy and well, and then sort of thing. I know that people, you can ask them to do… Tell them that they’re going to touch her with a feather and you stick a pin in them and they don’t feel it. You know what I mean? When they sit up straight away. But with that, reaching the inner soul of a person and then giving suggestions, maybe they might not be able to respond now, but how can you believe that not me or somebody else, professionals who speak to them, see if they will respond that way.
Romeo: Do you know? Because the body can do things, the ability where people, you can tell them you’ve stuck them to the wall, and people can put their foot to the wall and pull them and they can’t come away from the wall. I had five persons sitting on the bed. I’ve got another person leaning down, and told her to lift the bed, it’s going to be a lightweight. It’s going to be like a feather, when I had five witnesses. I done it really quickly. When she lifted the bed up, because the bed had a big wardrobe at the side, you couldn’t just pull the bed away from the wall. You had to pull the bed the long way out to get them out. But all these five persons were backwards, with their legs up to their heads, squashed in the wall, screaming and I said, “Well, I’ve got to pull it this way to get it out,” sort of thing.
Romeo: But yeah, people will tell me range in history where they have been and things like that. I’ve never written it down. I stopped doing it because one person, the next day, she would always be up early. The next day, her eyes were just black. We had to wake her up, dress her, everything, wash her, things like that. She was black all that day, her eyes. But then the next day she was all right. She was fine. But then I saw that again, black eyes, she was going to punch me very, very, very slowly. They said, “No, let her hit you. Let her hit you.” But very, very slowly. And two heads of her knuckles just touched my skin, it hurt me.
Romeo: And so then, what I did, I crossed my legs. I crossed my legs, disappeared under her, down to the ground. Then I stood up again. I put my hands in front of my face and just went… and took the mickey out of her, sort of thing. With that, it shocked her up. She chased me. The sisters stopped her, the other people, and they said, “Look, look, look. You’ve been in a trance for four days. Leave him alone.” So it depends how strong-willed the person is in their own mind-
Patrik: Oh definitely. Oh definitely.
Romeo: … whether they can take control. But if there’s an opportunity, and I think my daughter’s there and there’s a way we can help, that is a good weaning process they say. Well, that’s obvious. And they said before when you mentioned in the other hospital, they said, “Well, she could be on a tracheostomy after weaning off for like a year anyway.” And now they’re asking to do that. Then like you said, it’s a good sign.
- WHAT THE DOCTORS AND THE NURSES BEHAVIOUR IN INTENSIVE CARE IS TELLING YOU ABOUT THE CULTURE IN A UNIT!
- THE 10 THINGS YOU DIDN’T KNOW ARE HAPPENING BEHIND THE SCENES IN INTENSIVE CARE THAT HOLD YOU BACK FROM HAVING PEACE OF MIND, CONTROL, POWER AND INFLUENCE, WHILST YOUR LOVED ONE IS CRITICALLY ILL IN INTENSIVE CARE!
Patrik: That is a very good sign.
Romeo: Thank you, Patrik. We’ll maybe see what’s going on, and then we’ll talk to her tomorrow. And thanks for your help with our daughter.
Patrik: Absolutely. And I will send Tess some questions that she should be asking on a regular basis.
Romeo: Okay. I’ll pass you to Tess now. Thank you, Patrik.
Patrik: Okay, thank you. Thank you so much, Romeo.
Romeo: Okay. I say always hello and never no goodbyes because you need to run the Intensive Care Hotline. Thank you very much for your compassion and your love.
Patrik: No, thank you.
Romeo: Thank you, Patrik.
Patrik: Thank you so much. Thank you.
Romeo: Thank you.
Tess: Okay, Patrik. Thank you very much. I just want to establish, when do you think it might be a good time to call you tomorrow, your time?
Patrik: Look, I’m just trying to think. You could call me first thing tomorrow morning my time.
Patrik: So if you wanted to talk to me, for example, maybe ten o’clock tomorrow morning my time, which would be 12:00 PM your time, we could do that.
Tess: That’s fine. Brilliant.
Patrik: We could do that, or we could do the next morning your time. It’s up to you. You let me know.
Tess: Okay, thank you very much indeed. Am I just going to email what time, keep you much earlier.
Patrik: Oh, please, please. Anytime.
Patrik: And what I’ll do is, give me half an hour or so, I will send you some questions.
Tess: Okay. And I will read through them so that I’m fully equipped when I go in and see her at 6:00.
Patrik: That’s right. That’s right.
Tess: And also, because I’m going to be given written permission for the tracheostomy.
Patrik: Yeah, I would do. I would do it if I was you.
Tess: Okay. Okay. Thank you very much indeed. I really, really feel far better having spoken to you. It’s quite evident we’re in quite a tricky situation and I would like to… I’m 100% committed too, to helping my daughter-
Patrik: Of course.
Tess: … get better, and do everything within my personal power to actually facilitate that. If it means teaching her how to sing again, well so be it.
Patrik: Yeah, yeah.
- FOLLOW THIS PROVEN SYSTEM TO AVOID THE 3 MOST DANGEROUS MISTAKES YOU ARE MAKING BUT YOU ARE UNAWARE OF, IF YOUR LOVED ONE REQUIRES LONG-TERM VENTILATION WITH TRACHEOSTOMY IN INTENSIVE CARE!
- Why having a loved one critically ill in Intensive Care is a ONCE IN A LIFETIME situation and why YOU can’t AFFORD GETTING IT WRONG!”
Tess: So we’ll see what happens, yeah?
Patrik: Okay. Wonderful. Wonderful. Okay. Look out for my message, I’ll send that to you in the next half an hour and we’ll go from there.
Tess: Okay. Okay. Thank you very much, Patrik.
Patrik: Thank you so much.
Tess: Wishing you a good night and a good sleep.
Patrik: Yeah, same.
Tess: Okay. Thank you.
Patrik: Have a good day. Thank you so much. Bye.
Tess: Thank you very much. Bye-bye. Bye.
The 1:1 consulting session will continue in next week’s episode.
How can you become the best advocate for your critically ill loved one, make informed decisions, get peace of mind, control, power and influence quickly, whilst your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care?
You get to that all important feeling of making informed decisions, get PEACE OF MIND, CONTROL, POWER AND INFLUENCE when you download your FREE “INSTANT IMPACT” report NOW by entering your email below!
In Your FREE “INSTANT IMPACT” report you’ll learn quickly how to make informed decisions, get PEACE OF MIND, real power and real control and how you can influence decision making fast, whilst your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care! Your FREE “INSTANT IMPACT” Report gives you in-depth insight that you must know whilst your loved one is critically ill or is even dying in Intensive Care!
Sign up and download your FREE “INSTANT IMPACT” REPORT now by entering your email below! In your FREE “INSTANT IMPACT” REPORT you’ll learn how to speak the “secret” Intensive Care language so that the doctors and the nurses know straight away that you are an insider and that you know and understand what’s really happening in Intensive Care! In your FREE report you’ll also discover
- How to ask the doctors and the nurses the right questions
- Discover the many competing interests in Intensive Care and how your critically ill loved one’s treatment may depend on those competing interests
- How to Eliminate fear, frustration, stress, struggle and vulnerability even if your loved one is dying
- 5 mind blowing tips & strategies helping you to get on the right path to making informed decisions, get PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence in your situation
- You’ll get real world examples that you can easily adapt to you and your critically ill loved one’s situation
- How to stop being intimidated by the Intensive Care team and how you will be seen as equals
- You’ll get crucial ‘behind the scenes’ insight so that you know and understand what is really happening in Intensive Care
- How you need to manage doctors and nurses in Intensive Care (it’s not what you think)
Thank you for tuning into this week’s YOUR QUESTIONS ANSWERED episode and I’ll see you again in another update next week!
Or you can call us! Find phone numbers on our contact tab.
If you want a medical record review, please click on the link here.
Also check out our Ebook section where you get more Ebooks, Videos and Audio recordings and where you can also get 1:1 counselling/consulting with me via Skype, over the phone or via email by clicking on the products tab!
This is Patrik Hutzel from INTENSIVECAREHOTLINE.COM and I’ll see you again next week with another update!
- The 10 COMMANDMENTS for PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence if your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care
- What could be the cause if my critically ill loved one is removed from an induced coma but still hasn’t woken up?
- My 80 year old father is in Intensive Care with Myeloma! The Intensive Care team HAS ASKED ME TO SIGN A “DNR” AND I REFUSED! What are MY OPTIONS?
- The 3 most dangerous mistakes that you are making but you are unaware of, if your loved one is a critically ill Patient in Intensive Care
- The 5 questions you need to ask when the Intensive Care team is talking about “Futility of treatment”, “Withdrawal of life support” or about “Withdrawal of treatment”
- HOW TO STOP BEING HELD HOSTAGE BY THE INTENSIVE CARE TEAM if your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care!
- 5 POWERFUL THINGS YOU NEED TO DO IF THE INTENSIVE CARE TEAM IS NEGATIVE WHEN YOUR LOVED ONE IS CRITICALLY ILL IN INTENSIVE CARE!
- My Mum has been diagnosed with STOMACH CANCER and is in ICU ventilated. CAN I TAKE HER HOME on a ventilator?
- The questions you need to ask the most senior doctor in Intensive Care, if your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care
- How long does it take for my critically ill loved one to be taken off the ventilator and have their breathing tube/ endotracheal tube removed
- Why you must make up your own mind about your critically ill loved one’s situation in Intensive Care even if you’re not a doctor or a nurse!
- The ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM or HOW THE INTENSIVE CARE TEAM IS MAKING DECISIONS whilst your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care!
- MY PARTNER IS IN INTENSIVE CARE ON A VENTILATOR! THE INTENSIVE CARE TEAM WANTS TO DO A TRACHEOSTOMY AND I WANT TO HAVE HIM EXTUBATED! WHAT DO I DO?
- 5 ways you are UNCONSCIOUSLY SABOTAGING yourself whilst your loved one is CRITICALLY ILL in Intensive Care and HOW TO STOP doing it!
- How to make sure that “what you see is always what you get” whilst your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care
- 5 Ways to have control, power and influence while your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care
- Family overjoyed as top court rules doctors must seek consent before taking a patient off life support
- How to make sure that your values and beliefs are known whilst your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care
- My loved one has HIV, lymphoma on his brain, seizures, septic and is ventilated! The Intensive Care team is trying to TAKE MY HOPE AWAY and they are all NEGATIVE! HELP!
- MY PARTNER IS IN INTENSIVE CARE AFTER A BLEED ON A BRAIN! WE ARE WORRIED THAT THE INTENSIVE CARE TEAM WANTS TO SWITCH OFF THE VENTILATOR! HELP!
- HOW TO DEAL WITH A DIFFICULT INTENSIVE CARE TEAM, WHEN YOUR LOVED ONE IS CRITICALLY ILL IN INTENSIVE CARE!
- What the doctors and the nurses behaviour in Intensive Care is telling you about the culture in a unit
- How to take control if your loved one has a severe brain injury and is critically ill in Intensive Care
- How can I be prepared, be mentally strong and be well positioned for a Family meeting with the Intensive Care team?(PART 1)
- How can I be prepared, be mentally strong and be well positioned for a Family meeting with the Intensive Care team?(PART 2)
- The four DEADLY SINS that Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care CONSTANTLY MAKE, but they are UNAWARE OF!
- My HUSBAND had a HORRIBLE work accident and went into CARDIAC ARREST! Will he be PERMANENTLY DISABLED
- Why decision making in Intensive Care GOES WAY BEYOND your critically ill loved one’s DIAGNOSIS AND PROGNOSIS!
- The 4 ways you can overcome INSURMOUNTABLE OBSTACLES whilst your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care!
- How to get PEACE OF MIND, more control, more power and influence if your critically ill loved one is DYING in Intensive Care!
- The 5 QUESTIONS you need to ask, if the Intensive Care team wants you to DONATE your loved one’s ORGANS in an END OF LIFE SITUATION!
- MY PARTNER IS IN INTENSIVE CARE ON A VENTILATOR! THE INTENSIVE CARE TEAM WANTS TO DO A TRACHEOSTOMY AND I WANT TO HAVE HIM EXTUBATED! WHAT DO I DO? (PART 1)
- How MEDICAL RESEARCH DOMINATES your critically ill loved one’s diagnosis and prognosis, as well as the CARE and TREATMENT your loved one IS RECEIVING or NOT RECEIVING
- WHAT WOULD YOU DO if you knew that you COULD NOT FAIL, whilst your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care
- How the Intensive Care team is SKILFULLY PLAYING WITH YOUR EMOTIONS, if your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care!
- My father is in Intensive Care ventilated with LIVER FAILURE and KIDNEY FAILURE, I DON’T THINK HE WILL SURVIVE! HELP
- HOW TO GIVE YOURSELF PERMISSION TO HAVE PEACE OF MIND, CONTROL, POWER AND INFLUENCE WHEN YOUR LOVED ONE IS CRITICALLY ILL IN INTENSIVE CARE!
- My father has been weaned off the ventilator in Intensive Care and still has the Tracheostomy in. When can the Tracheostomy be removed?