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Hi, it’s Patrik Hutzel from intensivecarehotline.com with another quick tip for families in intensive care.

So, today’s tip is once again about, “Taking action when you have a loved one in intensive care.” It simply comes down to that you need to raise the awareness that the biggest challenge for families in intensive care is simply that they don’t know what they don’t know. They don’t know what to look for. They don’t know what questions to ask. They don’t know their rights and they don’t know how to manage doctors and nurses in intensive care to get the best care treatment and therefore, outcomes for their loved ones.

I’ll give you two examples today that we were dealing with in the last few days. We had an inquiry, on the weekend where a gentleman was saying that his 7-month-old son has been in ICU for seven months, basically from birth, that he was worried that the ICU team is not doing everything they can, that the ICU team is potentially wanting to let their son die, not giving best care and treatment.

Not even 24 hours later, I had an email from the client who said, “Well, my son has just passed away”, and that is extremely sad. It goes to show, you shouldn’t wait to get advice until the day before your loved one dies.

You got to keep in mind, approximately 90% of intensive care patients survive when you look at the research. So, you need to understand that no matter the doom and gloom in intensive care, the odds are in your loved one’s favor.

Now, that’s not what the intensive care team wants you to believe because they want to stay in control of the narrative. It’s much easier for them to control the situation if you believe that the odds are not in your loved one’s favor because then you have low expectations, and if you have low expectations, it’s so much easier for the intensive care team to “sell you” on an end-of-life situation rather than help you get the best care treatment and outcomes for your critically ill loved one. So, that’s the first example.

The second example is from another reader who has been in contact with us, who says, “Today they pulled life support at 12 a.m. midnight last night on my wife. She was breathing on her own and with a heartbeat on her own, but no cannula, nothing at all. They refused to give her the cannula saying that there is no use, she is brain dead.” Oh, that is a classic one. What I mean by that is a classic situation where a family is clearly misled.

If someone is brain dead, they are not breathing on their own. Look up the definition of brain death. Look it up online. If someone is brain dead, they are not breathing by themselves. So, I argue that the intensive care has not been truthful with you and that’s what we’re seeing all the time.

Intensive care teams don’t even share half of the story with families in intensive care because if you don’t know what you’re looking for, you stand no ground in a situation where you have a loved one in intensive care, fighting for their life. You will have no leg to stand on.

So, the best outcomes our clients get actually is when they’re determined and they take responsibility because, in both of those situations, the families didn’t take responsibility for the outcome. You, as a family, need to take responsibility for outcomes and you need to take responsibility for everything that’s happening. Only then will you be able to master the situation when you have a loved one in intensive care.

Case in point, I will post a link below this video to a podcast that I recorded the other day with one of our clients. We had the intensive care team also say, “Well, we’re going to withdraw life support because your family member won’t survive.” Well, that very family member was sitting on the podcast because this particular family took action, was determined, sought advice, and with our help, we saved the gentleman’s life, and you can listen to it on the podcast and see what the family has to say. So, the best outcomes we get for families and for our clients are when they take responsibility, follow advice, and let us do the talking with intensive care teams.

Make sure that you take responsibility for everything that’s happening and make sure that you are determined because only then can we really help you. If you’re not determined, if you let the intensive care team in your ear and you believe everything, they’re telling you without verifying that what they’re telling you is true, you will have no leg to stand on.

So, that is my quick tip for today.

If you have a loved one in intensive care, go to intensivecarehotline.com. Call us on one of the numbers on the top of our website or simply send us an email to [email protected] with your questions.

Also, have a look at our membership for families in intensive care at intensivecaresupport.org. There, you have access to me and my team, 24 hours a day, in a membership area and via email and we answer all questions, intensive care and intensive care related.

I also offer one-to-one consulting and advocacy over the phone, via Skype, email, Zoom, WhatsApp, and whichever medium works best for you. I also talk to doctors and nurses directly. I can represent you in family meetings with the intensive care team because I do speak the intensive care language.

We also provide medical record reviews in real-time. We provide second opinions in real-time. We also do medical record reviews after intensive care.

If you have unanswered questions, if you need closure, or if you’re simply suspecting medical negligence, we can help you with that as well.

Subscribe to my YouTube channel for regular updates for families in intensive care, click the like button, click the notification bell, share the video with your friends and families, and comment below what you want to see next or what questions and insights you have from this video.

Thanks for watching.

This is Patrik Hutzel from intensivecarehotline.com and I will talk to you in a few days.

Take care for now.