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Hi, it’s Patrik Hutzel from intensivecarehotline.com with another quick tip for families in intensive care.

Today, I have an email from Denise who says, 

“Hi Patrik,

My family and I are being forced to take my mom off life support and place her on the DNR (Do Not Resuscitate) list at, and I’m not going to mention the hospital here. She had a massive seizure on August the 9th of this year. They won’t wait until my little brother gets here from New York. We’ve been told the tracheostomy in her neck is the only way which we don’t want. They’re also trying to say we can’t control where the nursing home will be located at, but it will be far away from our location and her home. What can we do?” 

Thank you, Denise for sharing this. Let me shed some light on your situation.

So, the first thing that you need to change here is your words. You are saying you are being forced, no one can force you. That’s in your head, that is in your head and it’s in your head only. So, first off change your words because that creates your reality and if your reality is that you are being forced, that’s a reality you created so you can change that reality.

So, no one can force you. You have rights. You just need to get educated on your rights. I can see you’re in South Carolina. In South Carolina, I can assure you no one can force you to sign a DNR or take your mom off life support without your consent, that is illegal. Taking your mom off life support without your consent and her dying that could be perceived as murder. So, think about that. Think about that.

So, I believe you are reacting emotionally at the moment, which is understanding, but you can change that, and you need to change it.

So, let’s move on with your question, “You’ve been told a tracheostomy is the only option or the only way which we don’t want.” Now, that may actually be accurate, that the tracheostomy going forward, maybe her only option but we would need to look at medical records. We would need to look at ventilator settings. We would look at the whole sweep of medical records. We would need to talk to doctors and nurses directly and then make an assessment from there and give you that crucial second opinion.

Next, “They’re also trying to say we can’t control where the nursing home will be located at.” Again, you are placing things in your head that are probably not accurate. No one can force you or your mom to go to a nursing home. That’s hours and hours away from home. So, change your thoughts, change your language. Once again, you have rights there. 

Hospitals are very good at pretending they can do whatever they want until you challenge it. We wouldn’t be in business if we didn’t know how to challenge hospitals and get results for our clients, which by the way, you can look up on our testimonial section. We have saved many lives for our clients in intensive care. You can look up our testimonial section. You can look up our podcast section at intensivecarehotline.com and you will see that we’re getting results for our clients with our consulting advocacy.

I have worked in critical care and nursing for nearly 25 years in three different countries where I worked as a nurse manager for over 5 years and where I’ve been consulting and advocating for families in intensive care since 2013.

Once again, we’ve been saving many lives with our consulting and advocacy as it is verified on our testimonial section at intensivecarehotline.com. It’s also verified at our intensivecarehotline.com podcast where we’ve done many client interviews.

That’s also why we created the membership for families of critically ill patients in intensive care. You can become a member if you go to intensivecarehotline.com if you click on the membership or if you go to intensivecaresupport.org directly. In the membership, you have access to me and my team, 24 hours a day, in the membership area and via email and we answer all questions, intensive care related.

In the membership, you also have exclusive access to 21 e-books and 21 videos that I have personally written and recorded, sharing all my two and a half decades worth of intensive care and critical care nursing experience, making sure you make informed decisions, have peace of mind, control, power, and influence so that you can influence decision making fast, making sure your loved one gets best care and treatment.

I also do one-on-one consulting and advocacy over the phone, Zoom, WhatsApp, Skype, whichever medium works best for you. I talk to you and your families directly. I talk to doctors and nurses directly and I handhold you through this once in a lifetime situation that you simply can’t afford to get wrong. I also talk to doctors and nurses directly and I ask all the questions that you haven’t even considered asking but must be asked to hold intensive care teams to account. I also represent you in family meetings with intensive care teams.

We also do medical record reviews in real time so that you can get a second opinion in real time. We also offer medical record reviews after intensive care if you have unanswered questions, if you need closure, or if you are suspecting medical negligence.

All of that, you get at intensivecarehotline.com. Call us on one of the numbers on the top of our website or send us an email to [email protected] with your questions.

If you like my videos, subscribe to my YouTube channel for regular updates for families in intensive care, click the like button, click the notification bell, comment below what you want to see next, what questions and insights you have.

I also do a weekly YouTube live where I answer your questions live on the show. You will get notification for the YouTube live if you are a subscriber to my YouTube channel or if you are a subscriber to our email newsletter at intensivecarehotline.com.

Thank you for watching.

This is Patrik Hutzel from intensivecarehotline.com and I will talk to you in a few days.

Take care for now.