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Hi, it’s Patrik Hutzel from INTENSIVECAREHOTLINE.COM, where we instantly improve the lives for Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care, so that you can make informed decisions, have peace of mind, real power, real control and so that you can influence decision making fast, even if you’re not a doctor or a nurse in Intensive Care!
In the last blog I talked about
Why doctors in Intensive Care ask you to agree to do the unthinkable!
You can check out the last blog by clicking on the link here.
In this week’s blog I want to talk about
5 things the Intensive Care team hasn’t told you when your critically ill loved one is dying!
Before I get into today’s topic I want to share a quote with you that I wrote on today’s topic!
Death and dying in Intensive Care are not “sexy” topics and it’s not a topic where either the mainstream media or society in general wants to talk about!
If they do talk about death and dying in Intensive Care it’s usually in a hype and sensationalized manner by shining the spotlight on somebody who just died in Intensive Care after an accident, surgery etc… Stories like this certainly don’t tell the bigger picture, nor do they tell people what’s really going on in Intensive Care!
Media stories shine the light on the surface and not on what’s really happening in Intensive Care and especially not on what’s happening “BEHIND THE SCENES”.
When families of critically ill Patients have a loved one dying in Intensive Care they need proven strategies that work to deal with such massive “life or death” issues!
Families in Intensive Care therefore need urgent education on what they need to do in order to make informed decisions, get peace of mind, control, power and influence!
They also need to know if the Intensive Care team is telling them the truth if their loved one is really dying and they most importantly need to know what the Intensive Care team isn’t telling them!
Once families in Intensive Care have understood the bigger picture of what Intensive Care is all about only then should families agree to let their loved one die, if that’s really the only option!
So let’s get into today’s topic.
If your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care and the Intensive Care team has told you that your critically ill loved one is dying, there is a very good chance that they are not telling you the truth and the bigger picture!
You see, death and dying scares the shit out of people and it’s a topic most people avoid talking about at any cost!
The fact of the matter is that the minute we embrace that death is part of life, that’s when we can often look the inevitable in the eye and realize that it’s going to come to each of us one day…
Once we have embraced that death and dying are inevitable that’s also the time when we can look at it in a more rational manner by taking away some of the fear and the emotions that come attached to it!
Emotions are generally speaking a healthy sign and they are also a sign that we are alive, which is the opposite of being dead!
At the same time, in order to get the results you want need and deserve when your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care, you need to use those healthy emotions without letting them make you blind to what’s really going on in Intensive Care!
And the reason why 99% of the families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care don’t make informed decisions, don’t get peace of mind, control, power or influence is that their emotions make them blind to what’s really happening in Intensive Care!
Related:
On top of their emotions ‘running the show’ and ‘driving the bus’ so to speak, they are also intimidated by the “perceived power” and the “perceived authority” of the Intensive Care team!
You’ve got to stop doing that if you want to get results and outcomes that you and your critically ill loved one want, need and deserve!
How do I know?
After nearly 20 years Intensive Care nursing experience in three different countries, where I literally worked with thousands of critically ill Patients and their families and where I have also worked as a Nurse Unit Manager for over 5 years and with now counselling and consulting families in Intensive Care 1:1 on a day by day basis here at INTENSIVECAREHOTLINE.COM, I know Intensive Care, the dynamics and the games Intensive Care teams play inside out!
I also know the blind spots that families have in Intensive Care!
Therefore I can leverage that knowledge to successfully advocate for you, for your family and for your critically ill loved one here at INTENSIVECAREHOTLINE.COM and help you get the results very quickly that you want and deserve for your critically ill loved one and for your family!
No matter if your critically ill loved one is either in
you don’t want to rely on the Intensive Care team as the only provider of information in such dire situations that I mentioned before!
Especially when it comes to situations where the Intensive Care team is telling you that your critically ill loved one is dying, you certainly don’t want to be like the 99% of the families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care who make no informed decisions, have no peace of mind, no control, no power and no influence!
If the Intensive Care team is telling you that your critically ill loved one is dying, you better start doing your own research, you’d better start asking questions, you’d better start engaging someone like me, because you don’t want to just be nodding your head like the 99% of the families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care do!
If you do just nod your head when the Intensive Care team says something you might as well just stop reading here and go back to the 99%….
Here’s the deal!
Whenever the Intensive Care team is telling you that your critically ill loved one is dying, they haven’t told you about the bigger picture and they haven’t told you what’s really happening in Intensive Care!
Let’s look at this in detail.
1. “Only” 6-10% of all Patients in Intensive Care are dying
Given that the vast majority of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care are leaving Intensive Care alive, why should your critically ill loved one not belong to the vast majority of critically ill Patients leaving Intensive Care alive?
If “only” 6-10% of critically ill Patients in Intensive are dying, why should your critically ill loved one not be in the 90-94% bracket of people surviving Intensive Care?
Again, in order to get to the right answers, you got to ask better questions…
2. There is a difference between “real” vs “perceived” end of life situations and the Intensive Care team hasn’t told you about it
Whenever families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care come to us at INTENSIVECAREHOTLINE.COM and they are telling us that the Intensive Care team has told them that their loved one is dying and that they don’t know what to do, I simply ask them if their loved one is in a “real” or in a “perceived” end of life situation???
Most families in Intensive Care are baffled when I say that…
If the Intensive Care team has told you and your family that your critically ill loved one is dying, you’d better find out if your loved one is in a “real” or in a “perceived” end of life situation.
What’s the difference?
I’m glad you’ve asked! You can find out here
3. Intensive Care teams are negative by default!
A recurring theme we hear quite frequently at INTENSIVECAREHOTLINE.COM is that most families in Intensive Care are telling us that they feel the Intensive Care team is negative and it’s one of their biggest frustrations!
That’s no surprise to me that Intensive Care teams are negative.
Think about it, it’s their job to be negative!
If your loved one was admitted to Intensive Care and the Intensive Care team was all positive and happy and they told you that they’ll “fix” your critically ill loved one no matter what and then they don’t, they’d be in big trouble.
Remember Intensive Care is unpredictable and it’s a highly volatile environment!
That should not curb your optimism and you staying positive, no matter the odds!
Just think about it, what would you rather have happen?
A negative Intensive Care team and you and your family getting sucked into the negativity or would you rather have a negative Intensive Care team and you and your family staying positive?
I know which one I would choose…
You can’t change what other people do, but you can change how you react to it…
No matter the outcome, you have a much better chance of achieving your goals if you stay positive…
4. Money($$$), bed management issues, staffing issues, politics, hierarchies, the intrigue and the Psychology in an Intensive Care Unit often dictate the positioning of your critically ill loved one’s diagnosis, prognosis, the care and the treatment they are receiving or not receiving!
Now that you know that Intensive Care teams are negative by default, now that you know that “only” 6-10% of all critically ill Patients in Intensive Care are dying and now that you know that there is a difference between “real” and “perceived” end of life situations, we can now move on to the even finer details of the workings in an Intensive Care Unit!
Whenever the Intensive Care team is telling you that your critically ill loved one is dying, you need to look “BEHIND THE SCENES” in Intensive Care.
If you don’t you might as well throw in the towel…
What do I mean by that?
Look, Intensive Care is a “high stakes” environment. It’s a highly emotionally charged environment where the stakes are extremely high.
Related article/video
It’s also a very labour and resource intensive environment and it’s also a business environment. In fact it’s big business environment!
The cost of an ICU bed is ~$5,000 per bed day.
The demand for ICU beds is ever increasing.
The interests of Intensive Care teams to treat one Patient vs another is always there…
Therefore, if the Intensive Care team is telling you that your critically ill loved one is dying you better start asking a series of questions, including questions like
- does it mean that if my loved one is dying that the Intensive Care Unit is saving money or get more money in by getting a more profitable Patient in?
- does it mean that if my loved one is dying that the Intensive Care Unit is not having the staffing and/or equipment resources needed to let my loved one live?
- Is the Intensive Care Unit not prepared to invest the emotional, the staffing, the financial and the equipment resources required to let my loved one live?
- Are there other major ICU specific politics at play?
Recommended:
- How many other critically ill Patients lives have been saved in the past that were in a similar situation?
- What if I don’t take “no” for an answer, what’s the outcome going to be?
- What would I do if I knew that I couldn’t fail saving my loved one’s life?
5. The Intensive Care team most likely hasn’t told you that going home might be an option as well
Surveys and questionnaires in first world countries have revealed that 75% of people want to die at home if given a choice.
The sad and unfortunate reality is that less than 15% of the population in first world and developed countries actually do die at home!
Therefore, people are not dying the way they want to die.
It means that close to 85% of the population in first world countries die an institutionalized death that they don’t want in the first place.
The solution?
Many critically ill Patients in Intensive Care die over a period of time and if they do so, they could also die at home. Therefore a service like INTENSIVE CARE AT HOME is making this possible for you and your family!
And INTENSIVE CARE AT HOME is a “win-win” solution for all parties involved
- It provides quality of life/ quality of end of life for your critically ill loved one and your family
- It provides cost effectiveness, as INTENSIVE CARE AT HOME services is about 50% of the cost compared to a Hospital Intensive Care bed
- Intensive Care Units can focus on occupying their beds with other critically ill Patients
Your friend
Patrik
How can you become the best advocate for your critically ill loved one, make informed decisions, get PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence quickly, whilst your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care?
You get to that all important feeling of making informed decisions, get PEACE OF MIND, CONTROL, POWER AND INFLUENCE when you download your FREE “INSTANT IMPACT” report NOW by entering your email below!
In Your FREE “INSTANT IMPACT” report you’ll learn quickly how to make informed decisions, get PEACE OF MIND, real power and real control and how you can influence decision making fast, whilst your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care! Your FREE “INSTANT IMPACT” Report gives you in-depth insight that you must know whilst your loved one is critically ill or is even dying in Intensive Care! Sign up and download your FREE “INSTANT IMPACT” REPORT now by entering your email below!
In your FREE “INSTANT IMPACT” REPORT you’ll learn how to speak the “secret” Intensive Care language so that the doctors and the nurses know straight away that you are an insider and that you know and understand what’s really happening in Intensive Care!
In your FREE report you’ll also discover
- How to ask the doctors and the nurses the right questions
- Discover the many competing interests in Intensive Care and how your critically ill loved one’s treatment may depend on those competing interests
- How to eliminate fear, frustration, stress, struggle and vulnerability even if your loved one is dying
- 5 mind blowing tips& strategies helping you to get on the right path to making informed decisions, get PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence in your situation
- You’ll get real world examples that you can easily adapt to your and your critically ill loved one’s situation
- How to stop being intimidated by the Intensive Care team and how you will be seen as equals
- You’ll get crucial ‘behind the scenes’ insight so that you know and understand what is really happening in Intensive Care
- How you need to manage doctors and nurses in Intensive Care (it’s not what you think)
Thank you for tuning into this week’s BLOG and I’ll see you again in another update next week!
Make sure you also check out our “YOUR QUESTIONS ANSWERED” section where I answer your questions or send me an email to [email protected] with your questions!
Or you can call us! Find phone numbers on our contact tab.
Also check out our Ebook section where you get more Ebooks, Videos and Audio recordings and where you can also get 1:1 counselling with me via Skype or over the phone and via email by clicking on the email and phone counselling tabs on the top of the website!
This is Patrik Hutzel from INTENSIVECAREHOTLINE.COM and I’ll see you again next week with another update!
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Related Articles:
The 5 QUESTIONS you need to ask, if the Intensive Care team wants you to DONATE your loved one’s ORGANS in an END OF LIFE SITUATION!
INTERVIEW WITH MEDICAL FUTILITY LAWYER PROFESSOR THADDEUS POPE ABOUT MEDICAL DISPUTES IN INTENSIVE CARE REGARDING END OF LIFE DECISONS
HAS THE INTENSIVE CARE TEAM GOT THE ULTIMATE POWER WHEN IT COMES TO STOP TREATING YOUR CRITICALLY ILL LOVED ONE IN INTENSIVE CARE?
5 signs to look out for when it’s time to let go if your loved one is critically ill and dying in Intensive Care!
What is a good death in Intensive Care?