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Hi, it’s Patrik Hutzel from INTENSIVECAREHOTLINE.COM , where we INSTANTLY improve the lives of Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care, so that you can have PEACE OF MIND, real power, real control and so that you can influence decision making FAST, even if you’re not a doctor or a nurse in Intensive Care!
In last week’s BLOG I’ve shown you “The three distinct reasons the Intensive Care team doesn’t want you to question their approach or have PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence!”
You can check out last week’s BLOG here!
In this week’s BLOG I want to show you
“A 5- step BLUEPRINT for DYING WELL and with DIGNITY in Intensive Care”
Having a loved one critically ill in Intensive Care is one of the most stressful events during your lifetime.
This is even more true when your critically ill loved one is in one of the most difficult and challenging situations there are in Intensive Care such as when they are
- very unstable and in a very critical condition
- in a life threatening situation
and what about if your critically ill loved one is inevitably dying in Intensive Care?
DEATH is not a “SEXY” topic
Let’s face it. You and your Family are facing your worst nightmares.
DEATH is not a “SEXY” topic. DEATH is not a topic society wants to talk about. DEATH is not something that fits well with our perceptions about youth, vitality and health.
The reality and the truth of the matter is that we are all going in the same direction, whether we like it or we don’t.
The truth of the matter also is that in an environment such as Intensive Care people inevitably DIE.
Let’s quickly look at some facts and figures:
According to most statistics, around 6- 10% out of all Patients admitted to Intensive Care pass away. In comparison, around 10% of all people admitted to hospitals die.
That means that on average more people die on hospital wards compared to Intensive care.
But let’s not get too caught up in the facts, figures and statistics, because we are dealing with real human beings here and not with statistics!
END OF LIFE situations in Intensive Care are a regular occurrence and are often handled poorly
Even though, end of life situations in Intensive Care are a frequent and regular occurrence, most of the time they are handled very poorly, for a number of reasons.
Lets give you some real world examples:
A previously fit and healthy 78 year old man cycled around the block and collapsed because he had a heart attack. He got admitted to Intensive Care where he never woke up again, as he also had a stroke during his ICU stay.
The Intensive Care team suggested to the Family to start palliative measures on this man as being “in his best interest”, life support was removed and he was left to DIE over many days in an open cubicle in a very busy Intensive Care Unit.
The 78 year old man and his Family had no privacy or dignity, despite empty side rooms(closed cubicles) being available in the Intensive Care Unit. On top of that other awake Patients and their Families in the vicinity of this DYING man, also had to deal with the emotional scenes at the bedside.
It took the Intensive Care staff a few days until the man and his Family finally could find peace in a quiet side room in the Intensive Care Unit.
The worst about this situation I found was that the convenience to have this man in an open cubicle was more about the convenience for the staff and not respecting the needs, the privacy and the dignity of a DYING man and his family.
A 58 year old lady DIED over three months in ICU and everybody knew it
Another terrible, undignified END OF LIFE situation in Intensive Care I witnessed over many months, was this 58 year old lady who after having received a lung transplant 2 years prior to her being readmitted to Intensive Care, was left in the busiest and noisiest part of an Intensive Care Unit.
She was there in Intensive Care on a ventilator with a Tracheostomy struggling and fighting for her life!
Everybody who had some common senses and everybody who has worked in Intensive Care for a considerable length of time knew that this lady would DIE.
However, the Intensive Care team avoided the END OF LIFE discussions with this lady and her family. Both, the 58 year old lady and her Family were in massive distress and so where the nursing staff being involved with this DYING lady, because the DEATH topic and the discussions around the END OF LIFE process where clearly being avoided for a number of reasons.
And most of all the Family was suffering, which was evident in the poor body language they displayed every time they visited their loved one.
It was a horrible situation to watch and a cloud was hanging over the Intensive Care Unit as everybody knew and could feel the tragedy unfolding in front of our very eyes rather than getting this lady in a dignified and private side room and also start the discussions around the END OF HER LIFE and how she would like to spend her final days.
The Intensive Care team of course had other interests as well, such as continuing to get funding for this lady and also continue to do medical research, as especially with lung transplants, there is considerable evidence and research still to be gathered in order to find out how long people can live with a set of donor lungs.
The lady in her last 48 hours was finally moved into a private and dignified side room and passed away there with her family at her side.
Related Article:
Palliative Care Australia is calling for better end of life care services!
Those are pretty compelling statistics if you ask me and it goes to show that Hospitals, governments, doctors and nurses are not paying any attention to what people really want.
Thankfully some alternatives exist, even for Intensive Care Patients, check out INTENSIVE CARE AT HOME www.intensivecareathome.com.au
Does the Intensive Care team want you to have PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence if your loved one is DYING?
And what about your PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence? Is the Intensive Care team having a good chat with you or are they just talking over you and not with you when it comes to the END OF LIFE of your critically ill loved one?
- Has the Intensive Care team asked you how you want the END OF LIFE situation of your loved one to look like?
- Has the Intensive Care team asked you whether you need more time or whether you have any special wishes?
- Has the Intensive Care team asked you whether you think that Intensive Care is the right environment for your loved one to DIE?
- Has the Intensive Care team spoken to your critically ill loved one if they are awake and conscious?
- Are you and your critically ill loved one FULLY INFORMED, about what and why things are happening?
Putting things in perspective
Did you know that studies suggest that “a change in the health status of a family member” is right in the top 10 of the major stress factors in life?
Imagine that! “A change in the HEALTH status of a family member” is in the top ten of the major stress factors in life.
There is no mentioning about critical illness or even DEATH in Intensive Care! It just says “a change in the health status of a family member”. That could be anything. It could be a flu, it could be a mental illness, it could be a broken leg.
“A change in the HEALTH status of a family member” sounds pretty benign to me compared to a situation where your critically ill loved one is DYING in Intensive Care!
Therefore, you and your Family need to have PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence because otherwise the Intensive Care team will just walk all over you and your critically ill loved one in END OF LIFE situations and you come out at the other end and you will have no PEACE OF MIND, no control, no power and no influence and you will have negative memories and a very bitter taste in your mouth.
A negative END OF LIFE experience might stick with you for the rest of your and your Family’s life.
Therefore, with all my experience and after having worked with literally thousands of critically ill Patients and their Families in more than 15 years Intensive Care nursing, I give you
A five step BLUEPRINT for DYING well and with dignity in Intensive Care
- Make sure that you are involved in a TRANSPARENT process
Has the Intensive Care team being transparent in their dealings with you and has there been open disclosure? Are you and your Family actually under the impression that “what you see is what you get?”
Or do you feel like the Intensive Care team has pressured you into “withdrawing life support” as being “in the best interest” for your critically ill loved one?
Make sure that before you agree into anything that could potentially result in the DEATH of your critically ill loved one that you have done your own independent research here at INTENSIVECAREHOTLINE.COM
Related Article:
Why you need to make up your own mind even if you are not a doctor or a nurse in Intensive Care
- Make sure that you and your Family have a say about the END OF LIFE situation
I’m sure that if your loved one is DYING in Intensive Care you don’t want it to be a process where you are a passive bystander. Get involved, have a say and direct the END OF LIFE situation.
That could be getting your cultural, spiritual and/or religious needs met. It could also be a matter about timing.
Do you need more time to grief, do you want certain Family members to be there? Do you still need to wait for certain family members from overseas or interstate?
Make sure you and your Family are not getting asked to “switch off” LIFE SUPPORT at a certain time because the Intensive Care team needs the bed for the next admission. Make sure you look at the situation from all ankles.
Recommended resources:
- Make sure you and your loved one get privacy, dignity and WORLD CLASS care
The care you and your loved one are receiving in an END OF LIFE situation reflects the values of the Intensive Care Unit.
The care you and your loved one are NOT receiving in an END OF LIFE situation also reflects the values of the Intensive Care Unit.
If you are not treated with courtesy, if you are not getting offered time for you to come to grips with things, if they are not offering you a private side room and if you feel like staff involved in the END OF LIFE situation have little or no experience then you need to speak up!
Ask for the best, don’t accept “No” for an answer and if you don’t get what you want be “difficult and demanding”. It’ll make all the difference and it’ll give you PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence.
Related Articles
- Make sure that it’s not a rushed or hastened END OF LIFE situation and take the time you need in order to make peace with the DEATH of your loved one
I have seen far too many END OF LIFE situations in Intensive Care that were rushed or hastened, because the Intensive Care team put pressure on the Families to free up the bed as quickly as possible as they had other admissions waiting for the ICU bed.
You and your Family need to be strong, you need to turn things around and you need to start managing the Intensive Care team and not the other way round.
Remember this is your situation. This is your time to have PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence!
This is about you, your Family and your critically ill loved one! Make sure you don’t get this “ONCE IN A LIFETIME” situation wrong!
Related article
- Consider your loved one DYING at home as a real possibility
I have stopped counting how many people have asked during END OF LIFE situations in Intensive Care whether they can take their loved one home.
Remember those statistics from earlier? 75% of people want to DIE at home if given the option! The question is are you giving your critically ill loved one the option?
You know that you have more PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence if your loved one is approaching their END OF LIFE in their own home!
Are you and your Family making sure that this “ONCE IN A LIFETIME” situation is truly directed the way you want it to happen?
Again, check out INTENSIVECAREATHOME.COM.AU for more information how your loved one might be able to have a more peaceful, dignified and private DEATH.
How can you have PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence whilst your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care?
You get to that all important feeling of PEACE OF MIND, CONTROL, POWER AND INFLUENCE when you download your FREE “INSTANT IMPACT” report NOW by entering your email below!
In Your FREE “INSTANT IMPACT” report you’ll learn quickly how to get PEACE OF MIND, real power and real control and how you can influence decision making fast, whilst your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care! Your FREE “INSTANT IMPACT” Report gives you in-depth insight that you must know whilst your loved one is critically ill or is even dying in Intensive Care! Sign up and download your FREE “INSTANT IMPACT” REPORT now by entering your email below!
In your FREE “INSTANT IMPACT” REPORT you’ll learn how to speak the “secret” Intensive Care language so that the doctors and the nurses know straight away that you are an insider and that you know and understand what’s really happening in Intensive Care!
In your FREE report you’ll also discover
- How to ask the doctors and the nurses the right questions
- Discover the many competing interests in Intensive Care and how your critically ill loved one’s treatment may depend on those competing interests
- How to eliminate fear, frustration, stress, struggle and vulnerability even if your loved one is dying
- 5 “killer” tips& strategies helping you to get on the right path to PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence in your situation
- You’ll get real world examples that you can easily adapt to your and your critically ill loved one’s situation
- How to stop being intimidated by the Intensive Care team and how you will be seen as equals
- You’ll get crucial ‘behind the scenes’ insight so that you know and understand what is really happening in Intensive Care
- How you need to manage doctors and nurses in Intensive Care(it’s not what you think)
Thank you for tuning into this week’s “BLOG” and I’ll see you again in another update next week!
Make sure you also check out our “YOUR QUESTIONS ANSWERED” section where we answer your questions or send me an email to [email protected] with your questions!
Also check out our Products section where you get more Ebooks, Videos and Audio recordings and where you can also get 1:1 consulting!
This is Patrik Hutzel from INTENSIVECAREHOTLINE.COM and I’ll see you again next week with another update!
Sincerely, your Friend
Patrik Hutzel
Related Articles
- What is an induced coma and why is my critically ill loved one in an induced coma
- How long can a breathing tube or an endotracheal tube can stay in
- Tracheostomy and weaning off the ventilator in Intensive Care, how long can it take
- Why do doctors in Intensive Care insert a Tracheostomy after an induced coma
- How long should a Patient be on a ventilator before having a Tracheostomy?
- Why does my loved one need a Tracheostomy in Intensive Care
- What could be the cause if my critically ill loved one is removed from an induced coma but still hasn’t woken up?
- The 3 most dangerous mistakes that you are making but you are unaware of, if your loved one is a critically ill Patient in Intensive Care
- The 5 questions you need to ask when the Intensive Care team is talking about “Futility of treatment”, “Withdrawal of life support” or about “Withdrawal of treatment”!
- How long does it take to wake up from a Traumatic brain injury or severe head injury?
- Does my critically ill loved one in an induced coma or with head injuries feel my presence?
- My 25 year old wife has been in ICU for one month with Tracheostomy and is still in an induced coma
- The questions you need to ask the most senior doctor in Intensive Care, if your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care
- How long does it take for my critically ill loved one to be taken off the ventilator and have their breathing tube/ endotracheal tube removed
- Why you must make up your own mind about your critically ill loved one’s situation in Intensive Care even if you’re not a doctor or a nurse!
- The ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM or HOW THE INTENSIVE CARE TEAM IS MAKING DECISIONS whilst your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care!
- 5 ways you are UNCONSCIOUSLY SABOTAGING yourself whilst your loved one is CRITICALLY ILL in Intensive Care and HOW TO STOP doing it!
- How to make sure that “what you see is always what you get” whilst your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care
- 5 steps to become a better negotiator if your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care
- 5 Ways to have control, power and influence while your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care
- 6 phrases you should never say when your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care
- Family overjoyed as top court rules doctors must seek consent before taking a patient off life support
- How to make sure that your values and beliefs are known whilst your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care
- What the doctors and the nurses behaviour in Intensive Care is telling you about the culture in a unit
- How to take control if your loved one has a severe brain injury and is critically ill in Intensive Care
- Family Meetings in Intensive Care or the Elephant in the Room
- How can I be prepared, be mentally strong and be well positioned for a Family meeting with the Intensive Care team?(PART 1)
- How can I be prepared, be mentally strong and be well positioned for a Family meeting with the Intensive Care team?(PART 2)
- The four DEADLY SINS that Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care CONSTANTLY MAKE, but they are UNAWARE OF!
- Why decision making in Intensive Care GOES WAY BEYOND your critically ill loved one’s DIAGNOSIS AND PROGNOSIS!
- How to STOP being INTIMIDATED by the Intensive Care team and how you will be SEEN as EQUALS
- The 4 ways you can overcome INSURMOUNTABLE OBSTACLES whilst your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care!
- How to get PEACE OF MIND, more control, more power and influence if your critically ill loved one is DYING in Intensive Care!
- Five STRAIGHTFORWARD ways to improve Family satisfaction in Intensive Care!
- The 5 QUESTIONS you need to ask, if the Intensive Care team wants you to DONATE your loved one’s ORGANS in an END OF LIFE SITUATION!
- How MEDICAL RESEARCH DOMINATES your critically ill loved one’s diagnosis and prognosis, as well as the CARE and TREATMENT your loved one IS RECEIVING or NOT RECEIVING!